With Pat Tursi, Guardian, Lourdes Caregiver and CEO of Elizabeth Seton Children’s Center
Interview by Gail Berardino, DM, and Donna E. Coletti, MD DM
Dr. Coletti
Stephanie, are you aware that the other pilgrims on the Lourdes pilgrimage felt you were a star and themselves blessed by having you there? Do you have any particular insight to that and did you feel anything special?
Stephanie
Well, I have been blessed all my life, but on the last night leaving at the airport, everybody was waving goodbye to me. I mean just going there and seeing where Mary appeared to St. Bernadette at the Grotto was amazing. I actually did a reading at the Grotto Mass. Wow! That was a grace. I’m also good friends with Timothy Cardinal Dolan, who was on the pilgrimage as well. So just being there in that moment was just so real.
Pat Tursi
I want to share with Dr. Coletti that you had never read in church.
Stephanie
Reading has always been an issue for me. I had gotten better, but it had been going on for a long time, so I actually never, ever read in Church.
Pat Tursi
Yes, and the Orange Team pod was a tremendous support. Stephanie was at a second-grade reading level that recently improved after undergoing a shunt revision. With the expertise of her speech therapist, Stephanie’s reading had significantly improved, but I still didn’t know if she’d be able to do it. Our Orange team pod members rallied around Stephanie, especially Bridget Queally and Devin Gibbons who patiently and lovingly explained and rehearsed the lengthy Grotto Mass reading in the main lobby of our hotel. Stephanie is a friend to all, as you know. She knew every Malta team color and who they were. She has an incredible memory.
Gail Berardino
It was pretty special to be surrounded by those individuals. Devin, a granddaughter of one our Dames, Maureen Gibbons was on her first pilgrimage as a nursing student volunteer from Boston College. Also, there were a few nursing students from Fairfield University because one of the professors, Dr. Katherine Saracino accompanied them. Every year, my husband and I sponsor these student nurses in addition to those from Boston College and Villanova.
Pat Tursi
It was inspiring to see these young people so engaged with a compassionate and joyful spirit. We’ve all mentioned about how the spirit and blessings of Stephanie has a way of bringing people in, but I wasn’t sure that she would ever be able to complete the reading. She always wears pink, yet on this special day she wore a red heart print dress with a red Malta belt that Bridget gave her to bolster her confidence and embrace her with love. Stephanie was feeling very positive and confident in her role on that remarkable day. She does have anxiety in crowds, but among people she knows, it never bothers her. She can sing in front of large groups, but she has to feel like she’s with people that love her. So, right before the she was going to read, I looked at her and asked “Are you ready? Steph, do you remember what you said to me?
Stephanie
I said “I have my Malta family here and as long as I’m looking at the crowd and my Malta family, I got this”. It was so awesome.
Pat Tursi
Love. That’s what she said. That’s wonderful!
Dr. Coletti
That is so true. Stephanie, how does it make you feel to have a Malta family? What does that mean?
Stephanie
It makes me feel good. It’s funny because when we first went on the trip, Pat and I kept saying “You know we’re never going to see these people again.” or wondered if we were going to keep in touch. Then it was like every time you turned around someone wanted to help you and were asking, “Do you need this? Do you need help with that?” I felt like we bonded, you know?
Dr. Coletti
Well, it seems that as the International Spokesperson for the Elizabeth Seton Children’s you bring people together and because it’s important, you appreciate that these volunteers also bring people together.
Stephanie
Yes. Even people who don’t know me or haven’t heard of me, I still like to bring these people together.
Dr. Coletti
In this Ambassador role, you have met and brought together many people. Can you share what those experiences meant to your hopes and dreams.
Stephanie
I’m a big, big, big fan of Angela Bassett and the only child who ever asked for a “Make a Wish” request for her. My wish was granted, it came true and is still coming true because we are friends and keep in touch. She calls me directly for my birthday and comes to visit. Once and all of a sudden, I turned around and there she is, standing in my doorway. When I was having seizures and hadn’t seen her in a long time, she even called me on her birthday to lift me up. Her mother died from heart disease and she was being honored at the (American Heart Association’s) Red Dress event. She invited me, so we got to walk the Red Carpet and sit together at the award show. When the public relations people asked if she wanted her Honoree Award to be shipped, she said to “Give this to my friend, Stephanie” and autographed it for me. It’s hanging on the wall in my room upstairs.
Dr. Coletti
That’s very special and just another example of how you make connections and bring people together amid the challenge of an illness, like heart disease. You seem to surpass the challenges that you face. Can you share with us how you do that and what you want other people to learn from your role modeling of soldiering through with such grace?
Stephanie
I just want them to know and I don’t say this often enough, that sometimes we take things for granted. I don’t think we should take things for granted. We should look at the way you are, how much you have accomplished, how much you know and what you’ve done to help someone in need. If you don’t want to help others, then stand up for yourself and change who you are to be able to be a better person.
Dr. Coletti
How did you learn to be so wise?
Stephanie
I think because I had a good teacher in Pat. I met her when I was 2 years old. Every day I used to wheel myself down to her office in my little, little chair.
Dr. Coletti
It seems you knew that you had a soulmate.
Stephanie
Yeah, I did. I always said that God brought us together.
Dr. Coletti
Clearly. There were a couple of other people whom you’ve met as the International Spokesperson role when travelling to other countries and here in the USA.
Stephanie
I went to Rome, which at the time, I didn’t even know what or where Rome was. I wanted to go to reunite with Pope Francis again. I had met the Holy Father in 2015 at St. Patrick’s Cathedral through Cardinal Dolan and another friend of ours. I also met Pope Benedict XVI at St. Joseph’s Seminary in 2008.
Dr. Coletti
How did that make you feel, meeting the Pope?
Stephanie
Oh, that whole experience with Pope Francis really made a difference in my life because I was very, very sick. I get emotional just thinking about it.
Pat Tursi
It’s just your humanity showing, which is always so present.
Stephanie
It’s me!
Dr. Coletti
You are a role model because so much of our current world is not about showing one’s humanity and humility. It’s more about showing how great things are and how life is so easy for us. But when you’re so vulnerable and willing to share, it reveals an inner strength and sign of self-determination.
Pat Tursi
After meeting Pope Benedict XVI, she was really having trouble breathing and couldn’t even wheel her own chair. We brought her back to Elizabeth Seton Children’s Center for an evaluation and discovered that she needed to have a spinal fusion. This was while she was living at home in Brooklyn with her maternal grandma who only spoke Creole.
Stephanie
I had at a very young age, learned Creole so I could translate for my gramma.
Pat Tursi
She helped her grandma learn English and study for the citizenship test.
Stephanie
It’s because of me that my gramma is now a citizen. It’s awesome!
Pat Tursi
And she votes in every election just like you, Princess.
Dr. Coletti
What seems most important to you is having personal connections that raise others up as they raise you up. Is that true?
Stephanie
Yes.
Dr. Coletti
Thank you. It’s a beautiful example of how having Malta family helps people. We help ourselves by helping others and you, in turn get the grace back multi-fold. So, of all that you have done, what’s the biggest accomplishment that you have achieved?
Stephanie
What’s important to me right now is helping others because that’s what I’m doing here at the Elizabeth Seton Children’s Center. We have 169 children that are on ventilators, feeding tubes and with oxygen monitors. And we have young adults that are going to be aging out soon because once you turn 21, you have to leave. So, we’re going to be the first in the country to ever build a young adult center.
Dr. Coletti
Well, you are not only incredibly talented at bringing people together but anticipatory because that was my next question to you. You answered it before I even asked. Unbelievable! Being their Ambassador, what would you like people to know about the Seton Center.
Stephanie
Yup! I also want people to know that I became an Associate of the Sisters of Charity of New York, our sponsors, and will be renewing my commitment in September. So, I’m committed to help raise awareness for my friends who have medically complex conditions.
Dr. Coletti
What it sounds to me is, you have a ministry. A ministry that’s not just in Yonkers, NY but has gone onto Lourdes, France and the Vatican in Italy.
Stephanie
Yes.
Pat Tursi
In two months of 2023, we did back-to-back international travel but did not plan it that way. On March 15th, she was blessed by Pope Francis during the General Audience and in the first week of May, we were in Lourdes. It was unbelievable.
Dr. Coletti
When the spirit is on the move, the spirit is on the move and you were moving! What have you learned that you would like the children and other residents of the Seton Center and beyond to know about your journey?
Stephanie
That they would be loved and well cared for because we here at Elizabeth Seton Children’s really are a family. When you bring your child here, it’s like our sign in the lobby says, “All are Welcome.” Mother Seton is at every door and all doors will open at your coming.
Dr. Coletti
Beautiful.
Stephanie
I try to show that helping people is about being in your heart, not your head. On my unit, there was a boy who in middle of a young adult group was coughing and while we were waiting for the nurse, I went over to him and was rubbing his arm trying to console him.
Pat Tursi
Stephanie needed to be quarantined in her room for 14 days afterwards. This is part of the sacrifice of doing the right thing. So, she didn’t mind and was good with it because she was paying attention and it helped a friend. It’s not surprising. Stephanie’s there, being the consoler and healer for her good friend.
Stephanie
If anyone wants to get involved and know more, they can go to our website, setonchildrens.org or find us on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter.
Pat Tursi
Now, you’re sounding like our VP of Communications!
Dr. Coletti
Thank you, Pat, Stephanie and Gail. This has been an extraordinary blessing for us all. Godspeed your work.
